Petra’s Holistic Hub Blog

(marram grass as an indicator of resilience)

How much does a person need to repent? The other day a colleague gave me a small book with the title: Omdenken (flip-thinking) by Berthold Gunster. Being an arch-optimist, the book had a great appeal to me because for me the glass is half full instead of half empty. And that is usually very convenient because for every problem there are at least three solutions, since the problem is not the problem, it is all about the expectations, those are the problem! And as Wayne Dyer says: you yourself can create and adjust your own expectations. It is the facts that you cannot adjust, however, expectations are no facts.

Lees meer: De Toga op een Kiertje: marram grass as an indicator of resilience

In the event of a divorce, parents bear their own pain and frustration and unconsciously their children are burdened with that pain and frustration. You should be aware that ultimately everyone needs love and attention. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you will be able to join in with the other parent again. It is that connection which is crucial for the well-being of the children. It seems paradoxical. Yet, that movement in the opposite direction is needed to be able to bridge the gap again right through the pain. After all, they should not be worried about their parents. They want to discover the world and find a safe haven in parenthood. 

Lees meer: De Toga op een Kiertje: Remain a safe haven for your kids, also after the divorce …

In order to be able as a professional, a legal expert, a coach or a mediator to make a good diagnosis or an intake, so, before you can start the course of assistance, you must verify three conditions ...

Lees meer: De Toga op een Kiertje: May-Shall-Can I help you?

Eventually, at the beginning of 2015, I decided to refer to myself as Holistic lawyer, the run-up I described in blog 1 was unusual: via an accident, many books, reflection, Maui and Israel. And then?

Lees meer: De Toga op een Kiertje: from intention to ‘mission and vision’

After several journeys, I decided that in the future I would refer to myself as holistic lawyer and mediator, that I would admit as much. Would come out, because I want internally to be synchronic with what I show on the outside. My approach in divorce law practice has been holistic for years (since 2005), However, I have never plugged or propagated it as such.

Lees meer: De Toga op een Kiertje: Coming out as Holistic Lawyer

At this point in time, we are on the brink of a fundamental change in the legal profession – in being a lawyer. Our clients require another approach to solve their problems. They want lawyers to apply a wider approach. Furthermore, documents are provided on the web more and more ready for use, there will be e-judges and e-lawyers, which makes the practice of law simpler but also more impersonal.

Lees meer: De Toga op een Kiertje: The Integrative Law Movement

In a crisis situation in which a conflict erupts you often assume all kinds of biased judgements. You start a fight against the outside world which is mistaken, which does not mean well with you and is against you. But how do you know?

Lees meer: a different perception

Returning from a weekend with Wayne Dyer, I decided to position myself as a holistic lawyer and to discard my armour from that moment on. As a matter of fact, I abandoned the adversarial divorces and their proceedings several years ago, yet you cannot avoid the fact that time and again you are confronted with these proceedings. Knowing how to change the negative energy of people in such conflicts into positive energy is the real art. This you can manage if you are willing to look beyond the legal proceedings as such.

Lees meer: Holistic Law

Last week, I was at a conference of Hay House in Chicago. Hay House is an American publishing company which pre-eminently wants to make the connection between the here and now and the surrounding world. Mike Dooley was one of the speakers. He said: ‘If you want to do something, think of the end result. Think what it will look like, just as with the navigation in the car.’ You switch on your navigation device and put in the destination. Thereafter, you put your car in first gear and start driving. It does not make a difference whether you take the long or the short route, whether you make an intermediate stop or a huge detour. Eventually, time and again you will be brought back to the end result. Trust your GPS and do not shut the door.

Lees meer: Think like a GPS

Now I know that I became a lawyer to connect two worlds. The world in which our EGO governs and the world behind that. In a divorce these two clash, the EGO and the SELF. When reading this at his point you think: I give up, this is too woolly, I do understand. But if you are strong enough to park your doubts about so-called vagueness for a while, I encourage you to read on. Because I have something to tell that is really new.

Lees meer: the new family-law practice