The toga op een Kiertje: the new family-law practice

After almost 20 years of family law, it is time for a refreshing new approach. To you who read, I speak, wrote Joseph Benner in 1914. And so it is on my blog, too, which will be about the day-to-day family-law practice, my experiences which I would like to share with you and my outlook on the world.

Now I know that I became a lawyer to connect two worlds. The world in which our EGO governs and the world behind that. In a divorce these two clash, the EGO and the SELF. When reading this at his point you think: I give up, this is too woolly, I do understand. But if you are strong enough to park your doubts about so-called vagueness for a while, I encourage you to read on. Because I have something to tell that is really new.

Is it not extraordinary that Joseph Brenner’s message of 100 years ago is nowadays still so relevant? But what is that message, you wonder. I will tell you all about it. For a start, the message is that it will only arrive if the reader is ready. The Master appears when the Pupil is ready. Secondly, Benner says that the SELF is the Spirit existing in all of us. The Spirit is anchored in our Soul; this is rather deep, so brace yourself: the idea is that the EGO only comes into being at the moment we are born. Dr Wayne Dyer, a man I admire very much, speaks about that as well. Until the moment we are born, we are done. We grow in the belly and have no worries at all. From the day we are born we start adapting to the requirements set by our environment. Depending on where you cradle was, you are measured on the basis of all kinds of outward appearances. For instance, the house in which you live, the neighbourhood you grew up in or your father’s profession. We tend to identify with that. Our EGO is fed with assumptions which we make up and impose on ourselves. Dr Wayne Dyer gives as an example that you are what you practise as a profession, or you are as what your car looks like or you are the amount in your bank account. And if you lose that, you have a big problem.

I see a parallel in divorces. We are so afraid to lose everything we have built up that out of fear we make choices which primarily protect our EGO. We forget that there is another route: love.

That will be my topic in the following blogs, how can you deal with choices in emergency situations. For I am convinced that there always is a choice.